staring out

Yes another blog. 

I'm doing this because I have to cook every night now.  I have never had to cook every night before. 

Once the kids got old enough to eat "regular food" - and you know I miss the mac and cheese/ chicken nugget days- I have been fortunate enough to really never have my kids home every night.  Up until this year they would ALWAYS spend at least one, if not two nights at my moms house.  Mom would often make them dinner before I picked them up.  Sometimes I simply stayed for dinner.

On nights they weren't home we would often opt for pizza or have sandwiches.  Now that they are home every night, we still have pizza a few times a month but it's mostly me, cooking.  Trying out new things and finding hacks along the way. 

So my adventures in cooking started about three years ago when SR and I moved in together.  He had expectations that I was going to learn to cook.  Why?  Because I said it was something I wanted to do.  I wanted to learn to cook, and not just cook spaghetti and mac and cheese.  Sure, over the years I've been able to throw things together, to occasionally impress and feel proud of myself.  Once I put my late husband in the hospital with chicken dinner- but really that was just because he was sick anyway so I don't REALLY take the fall for that one. 

The first year of living together I played it very safe.  Hamburger helper, spaghetti, tacos.  Barely a step up from chicken nuggets and mac and cheese- but it was enough to satisfy everyone.

However, we were hanging around people.  Socializing has not always been my forte.  I don't mean, seeing people out of my house, but having people in my house.  Going to peoples houses for dinner.  Watching them cook.  Sometimes watching them cook in my house.  So it stands to reason that I would pick up a few things along the way.

I made friends with my crockpot, who before always turned out meals that tasted like "crockpot."  I also made friends with the oven.  Well, sort of.  My oven and I have a weird relationship.  I never really know what it's thinking- and I worry that sometimes it's purposely adjusting the temp by 25 degrees when I'm not looking.  Seriously. One day the recipe takes 35 minutes, some days it takes an hour.  Same recipe, same temperature.  What the fuck, right?

I have since learned to barbeque.  I agree that I think the barbequing should be left to the men folk, but SR never seems ready to grill when I'm ready for him to grill. 

I am learning the art of timing.  So that everything is done within minutes of each other- but not at the same damn time.  Heat is a tricky damn thing.  One minute too long on the stove or in the oven can turn brown into burnt.

Also, I am learning to take care of my house, in general.  Domesticity is not my baseline.  At 42, I can tell you that just last night I was asked to pick up the pile of dirty socks from underneath my desk.  Ohhh- THAT's where all my socks went!!  However, I DID say that I wanted to learn to be more domestic.  I'm 42 with 3-5 kids and it's about time I start acting a LITTLE more motherly.  I admit I'm always envious of people who keep their homes clean and tidy, who can make a meal without breaking a sweat or setting the meat on fire.  Who look like they belong in an apron with pearls on and for whom a recipe with more than 6 ingredients doesn't make them break out in hives. 

While I don't inspire to be Martha Stewart- I have to admit that there IS something exciting about a new recipe that turns out well.  There is a certain pride to seeing only empty laundry baskets instead of baskets that have clothes that need to go in the washer, or need to get folded and put away before they wrinkle. 

I don't HATE the domestic part of my life, but at 42 I'm reluctant to embrace it. Part of me wants to stay irresponsible and live off of cereal and Lean Cuisine.  I admit I'd rather pay someone to clean my house and cook meals than do it myself.  However I can't afford that and so far nobody has shown up at my door and offered to just do it for free.  So APRON UP I must. 

I think I just coined a phrase there.

I think that will be the name of this blog. 

That's how I roll.